I hear that writing about your job is the way to become more (in)famous.
So here goes my work story.

One of my fringe duties here at work is setting up the product demos from outside companies. Salespeople come in and bring free lunch, then chatter on about their products. I always ask difficult questions at the end just so they know I was listening. "Hey sales guy, why should I specify Derbigum over Siplast, when Siplast doesn't lock me in with a proprietary insulation system?" See, it makes me look smart. Well at least smarter than anyone usually suspects.

Anyway, today one of my coworkers acts like he's doing me a favor by showing up.
I should just say he was in a meeting and keep his free lunch as a leftover.
You don't shine my shoes by walking in that door m'man.