DUUMB DUMB DUMB DUUUMB, DUMB DUMB DUUUUMB
I saw the new Indy yesterday. I had my fingers crossed that the movie would rise to expectations, especially since I was intrigued from reading more of the backstory to Indy's life previously. I was encouraged that Ford was playing the appropriately aged character which would introduce a new facet (possibly realism) to Indy's exploits. I was wrong. Speilberg and Lucas have continued to push me into being a grumpy old man. This comment from a review of the movie I read today sums up this feeling, "... for those of you that feel that the new Star Wars Movies robbed your childhood, expect some molestations from Uncles' George and Steven..."
The story, the acting, the effects...all completely over the top and plastic. There was no character in the characters, including Indy. It was completely cheap gags and mindless action without tension. In the other movies, events and artifacts were there for reasons and it felt as if you were solving the riddles with Indy. In this one, you are lead by a leash through the plot with an occasional unexplained event (i.e. scary little blowgun fighters at a gravesite, which are there just for action and have no explained context).
What I always liked about the Indy movies is that they SEEMED epic in scope. The vision was wide and were able to take you to new places, even Temple of Doom. This installment had a cloistered feel to it, like you felt you were on the soundstage with the actors.
Finally, even with the supernatural overtones in the previous movies, I could suspend my disbelief and indulge in the story. I just watch all of the previous three in the last week and still had this feeling and even picked up on little things that I never noticed previously that added more realism (i.e. Indy and Marcus briefly discussing international agreements on artifact recovery in the beginning of Raiders). This movie along with its forced story never allowed my disbelief to be harnessed because the BANG was intentionally or unintentionally delivered in the beginning of the movie. SPOILER - the crystal skulls are of aliens! I don't have an issue with this, but done very poorly in a franchise that thrived on suspense, mystery, and tension.
Overall, this movie had great potential with everything that it contained, but its orchestration completely short in becoming more than the sum of its parts. Not the worst movie, that is still Troll 2, but disappointing.
posted by ajparrillo at 7:49 AM
8 Comments:
That was very well written.
You could do that for money.
You neglected to mention if Marion is still insanely hot after 25 years.
She is old and rough with those small wrinkles around the mouth. The banter is almost there in the beginning, like they filmed a run through. Then her character disappeared into a wide-smiling idiot who was infatuated with Indy. It was like seeing Carrie Fisher now, compared to slave Leah.
I was very frustrated the entire film with thoughts of how scenes and plot points could have worked with just a tweak.
As for the Mutt character. I agree with some reviews that the actor, whatever his name, comes off as very likable. THIS IS EXACTLY WHY HE WAS COMPLETELY WRONG FOR THE PART! He plays a greaser supposedly running from mainstream society. He sucks in that part. They play up his switchblade, but he never uses it. And the epitome of cross promotion, they continue to focus on his Harley for the first half of the film, even flying it to South America only to be left at a grave site when they are captured by the Soviets. I kept thinking, "wasn't that motorcycle important for some reason?"
Bad casting, bad acting, bad writing, bad CGI, bad rising action, bad believability, bad memories. I want to cry...like they murdered my grandpa.
Useful tip:
You don't say "SPOILER - Bruce Willis is already dead."
You say "SPOILER BELOW, don't read any further if you don't want to know. Seriously, coming up in a second I'm going to reveal a spoiler to a movie that just came out before you've had a chance to see it. You've been warned. Bruce Willis is already dead."
Give us a chance to look away first.
This comment has been removed by the author.
The "spoiler" was a joke. I thought the crystal skull myth was already apparent with all the media hype. In any event, you gotta resist the urge to keep reading if you see the word "spoiler." You are not in a runaway reading bus. Your self-control is your project.
SPOILER BELOW, don't read any further if you are a retard (old skool use) who cannot stop reading when they see the word SPOILER (good?)....Indy loses an eye in a later adventure. Let's see if this ruins a future crappy George and Steven movie for anyone.
SPOILER:
You're both queerbaits.
Stop making me be rational! I like thinking I can crawl under the skin of people I don't know. And yes, I am quite the piece of man meat.
I find this funny.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jDdtzpmVb1U&feature=related
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