Upon Wings Of Golden Fate
It’s no secret that my life is vastly different now than it was a few months ago.
For example, I bought a pair of shoes that I only wear at work. They feel like dress slippers. They look like classy suave executive material slippers. Another thing I’ve changed is I have a new watch that is all metal. It looks better while at work than one with a Velcro strap.
The final thing I’ve changed is I belong to a gym. I haven’t gone this week, so maybe I’m like the old me again except for the slippers.
But that’s the point of this post, the working out. I’m not going to brag about what I bench, the diameter of my pipes, or how much I can max out on my flactoids.
I’m here to talk about the Universe.
It seems that every few weeks I forget my lock at my locker. Maybe because just like in Junior High I’m focused on covering my naughty bits instead of just putting on my clothes. Anyway, I forget my lock, then come back a few days later and look in the lost ‘n found box. I have a purple masterlock, bought primarily b/c it’s cheap.
The past two times I’ve gone to the lost ‘n found, I’ve come across at least 4 identical locks to mine.
ARTIST’S RENDITION OF MY LOCK ALONG WITH OTHERS, ARTIST FORGOT TO MAKE DIAL PURPLE.
Each time I’ve done the exact same thing, locked up the first lock, hold the others in my opposite hand, and do my combination. And what has happened each time?
The Lock Has Opened!
This means one of two things.
A-I have magical powers that allow me to ‘read’ the psychic aura of my lock and pick it out of a lineup.
B-All purple masterlocks have the same combination and someday soon someone will steal my cool non slipper shoes while I am lifting weights.
For example, I bought a pair of shoes that I only wear at work. They feel like dress slippers. They look like classy suave executive material slippers. Another thing I’ve changed is I have a new watch that is all metal. It looks better while at work than one with a Velcro strap.
The final thing I’ve changed is I belong to a gym. I haven’t gone this week, so maybe I’m like the old me again except for the slippers.
But that’s the point of this post, the working out. I’m not going to brag about what I bench, the diameter of my pipes, or how much I can max out on my flactoids.
I’m here to talk about the Universe.
It seems that every few weeks I forget my lock at my locker. Maybe because just like in Junior High I’m focused on covering my naughty bits instead of just putting on my clothes. Anyway, I forget my lock, then come back a few days later and look in the lost ‘n found box. I have a purple masterlock, bought primarily b/c it’s cheap.
The past two times I’ve gone to the lost ‘n found, I’ve come across at least 4 identical locks to mine.
ARTIST’S RENDITION OF MY LOCK ALONG WITH OTHERS, ARTIST FORGOT TO MAKE DIAL PURPLE.
Each time I’ve done the exact same thing, locked up the first lock, hold the others in my opposite hand, and do my combination. And what has happened each time?
The Lock Has Opened!
This means one of two things.
A-I have magical powers that allow me to ‘read’ the psychic aura of my lock and pick it out of a lineup.
B-All purple masterlocks have the same combination and someday soon someone will steal my cool non slipper shoes while I am lifting weights.
Labels: amazing kreskin
posted by The Cruise at 11:40 AM
3 Comments:
I have one lock that I can unlock with the wrong combination. That's probably due to it being all rusty and stuff.
At work, over half of the people don't even put locks on their lockers. It's a pain in the ass having to open up a bunch of lockers to finally find an empty one. I should start taking stuff and selling it on ebay.
Since when have you been worried about covering your "naughty bits"? Just immagine you are with Brent and you will feel free to dingle dangle all you want, instead focusing on finding all your belongings.
Back when I had my Mazda 626, I mistook another for mine in the UC parking lot and my key opened the door. I should have played the lottery that night.
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