Standing on the Shoulder of a Giant

Friday morning I spent some time at a friend’s career day for his middle school. It was an eye opening experience. Children are our future, we should teach them well and let them lead the way. Luckily, I was in positive mode and didn’t spend my entire time convincing them Architorture is Dumb. Maybe this is because I had my yearly review on Thursday. It went well, they think I’m good at what I do. Or is it It went good, they think I’m well at what I do? Luckily, English is not part of my job.

I went back to work in the afternoon and started a new project, mainly because they can see I’ve banged my head against the wall for too long on the previous project and was in danger of Losing It. We had our office’s typical monthly Friday meting where we discuss the state of the company, and have some beer and chips. I had a Bridgeport, and unlike most days, the brew did not taste like liquid awesome. It dawned on me that those kids were still on my mind. How could I drink at work when I should be working for their future. I decided that I was done drinking. Done drinking for the kids.

After work I went to a sustainability gala, learned a couple things about Portland’s green community, had some horse douvers, but most importantly, I did not have any free Laurelwood beer. For the Kids, you see. The Future.

I got home and decided that spending time with any peers would stop my mission.
Any time spent with my former lush compatriots would be a step away from my task.
Friday night alone allowed me to watch Big Trouble in Little China. It was time well spent.

Saturday I got up refreshed and clear headed. The future was here, and it was mine.
I spent the time I would normally spend sleeping or practicing general hygene went into painting my front porch and working on my kitchen cabinets. It was productive and fun. I realized that in the future, The Kids will need a home. And if that home has a dingy porch and the kitchen cabinets are not green with brushed chrome pulls, The Kids will suffer. In the midst of some heat gun action, I got a phone call. It was my parents. Gstoph asked if I was sitting down, he had news to tell me. Previous sit down news has been: Death In The Family, We Bought Alpacas, No Matter How Much You Wish It Was True You Aren’t Adopted, That Lady Isn’t Really Your Aunt We Tricked You.
This time the news was even bigger: When Your Father Retires (Again) We Are Moving Out West.
They plan on moving to Olympia in about 3 years. This is pretty cool, but it means I only have 3 years to meet, marry and impregnate a girl (probably maybe in that order) before my mom comes out here and chases them all away. I needed some air. So I left the house for a little bit. I went to the park and threw the disc with my friend, a younger lady. She suggested seeing a movie afterwards, “The Breakup” because it would be funny. I suggested we should see “Hard Candy” because my clever assessment of the circumstances was funny. No one else got the joke. We saw “The Breakup”. We both went home early, and I watched “L4yer Cake”. Here’s my movie review. “L4yer Cake? more like L4yer Crap”. It’s sort of ironic that the worst band I’ve ever seen live is Brick Layer Cake. I went to bed still trying to comprehend the fact that my parents are moving out here. I think I want to keep their donkeys in my basement.

Sunday I got up and had an epiphany:

I have a new agenda, I am going to drink all the beer before the kids get a chance to. Their future is brighter It’s basically the same mission, BEER/KIDS/FUTURE. I’m just taking a different tack. A strong man, nay, a Regal man, knows when his life’s dream is but folly and must be amended. I am now drinking again. My grande ex machinations did last over 38 hours, so they were a full success. More news later…