Anniversary: or How soon is too soon?
They say that Time plus Tragedy equals comedy.
But is there ever a time to make light of truly horrific events?
“Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall down an open manhole and die.”
- Mel Brooks:
I don’t know, I’m not a professional funnyman. I’m no Carlos Mencia or Joe Rogan or Carrot Top. All I am is a guy who likes to make people smile. But there are lines I shouldn’t cross just to get a laugh. I did that, and I apologize. As you all know, it was recently the anniversary of a very trying period in our nation’s history, and I made a callous joke to make light of the situation. I could have removed my offensive post, but I’m man enough to admit my mistakes. So I’ve decided to come clean and give the real story.
This is roughly the one month anniversary of my father breaking his ankle, and I made light of the situation by fabricating a story of daring do to cover up the real reason he was injured. Here I am, coming clean and giving you the real occurrence.
My dad loaded up a box of civil war books to sell on Ebay, and put them in my family’s pink golf cart http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2082/1326/1600/DSCN0117.jpg
My dad got out of the cart on the way to the other house to open up a livestock gate, when the box slid off the seat and hit the gas pedal. The golf cart shot forward at 5 miles an hour and ran over my father’s leg, crushing it. He bravely remounted the golf cart that was now spinning its wheels in an attempt to move past the fence and drove to my mother, who was able to transport him to the hospital. This is the true story, and is obviously no laughing matter.
Sorry for the pain I caused.
But is there ever a time to make light of truly horrific events?
“Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall down an open manhole and die.”
- Mel Brooks:
I don’t know, I’m not a professional funnyman. I’m no Carlos Mencia or Joe Rogan or Carrot Top. All I am is a guy who likes to make people smile. But there are lines I shouldn’t cross just to get a laugh. I did that, and I apologize. As you all know, it was recently the anniversary of a very trying period in our nation’s history, and I made a callous joke to make light of the situation. I could have removed my offensive post, but I’m man enough to admit my mistakes. So I’ve decided to come clean and give the real story.
This is roughly the one month anniversary of my father breaking his ankle, and I made light of the situation by fabricating a story of daring do to cover up the real reason he was injured. Here I am, coming clean and giving you the real occurrence.
My dad loaded up a box of civil war books to sell on Ebay, and put them in my family’s pink golf cart http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2082/1326/1600/DSCN0117.jpg
My dad got out of the cart on the way to the other house to open up a livestock gate, when the box slid off the seat and hit the gas pedal. The golf cart shot forward at 5 miles an hour and ran over my father’s leg, crushing it. He bravely remounted the golf cart that was now spinning its wheels in an attempt to move past the fence and drove to my mother, who was able to transport him to the hospital. This is the true story, and is obviously no laughing matter.
Sorry for the pain I caused.
posted by The Cruise at 10:15 AM
6 Comments:
I am laughing wildly! Nice pink golf cart and I cannot imagine the grief your father got from your mother for the "stupidity"...I have seen her in action.
I know why you named those comedians...nice written sarcasm. I am now an expert on comedy and they are of course all hacks. However, Carrot Top gets a pass because he as a good sense of humor about himself. Carlos Mencia presents stereotypes with absolutely no comedic twist...funny. Isn't Joe Rogan just a mean spirited guy who came across as a comedian because of the writing on Talk Radio?
Oh...I really got choked up reading the false post until I began to realize how over the top it was. But it was believable because your dad is that type of guy who would risk and give his life to save the innocent. I hope your dad recovers from the injury resulting not as eventful reality. God's speed George Christoph...thanks for the Algebra foundation.
Dad hasn't saved anybody's life since like 1980.
Guy got knocked out and cracked his skull open trying operate a sailboat during a severe lightning storm. Dad had Marv race him out there in a ski boat, jumped in and did some minor first aid, then sailed him back to safety.
He did save two of his donkeys after they fell through the ice of his pond a few years ago.
But what has he done cool lately? Nothing. I need new hero dad stories so bad I have to invent them.
These are the events that I remember of my dad in my life.
age 10: He bought me a BB gun for X mas when we were living in NH and he was in MS.
age 12: He bought me some school clothes when I moved to VA (he lived there too) from NH.
age 13: He drove me to a little league game.
age 17: He took me to the courthouse in Powhatan County to get my license back after having it suspended for 6 months. The reason? My friend and I were coming back from a gathering in Powhatan, and we each had two beers from a keg. Well, Powhatan was in the middle of nowhere, and Freddie thought it would be cool to see how fast the Hyundai Excel would go. It hit 80, but a Radio Flyer probably has more stability than a Hyundai at that speed, at least back then. We got pulled. He was driving and 18. I was a passenger and 17. He got a ticket because he was an adult (he blew a .54.) I got my license suspended because I was a minor, posession of alcohol (I blew a .51..... not mention I volunteered to take a breathalizer), go figure. Sorry, I had to share that sad little antic dote of stupidity. NEVER volunteer to take a breathalizer!
age 19: Pa Sigman randomly came through my line at Sam's Club when I was a part time cashier. He didn't recognize me.
The End:
I never had a hero.
Daniel,
Did you ever know that you're my hero?
It must have been cold there in my shadow, to never have sunlight on your face.
You were content to let me shine, that's your way.
You always walked a step behind.
My dad is a good fellow...a bit disgruntled and brainwashed nowadays, but this is only a fraction of his life.
I would call my dad a hero of sorts because he works hard, cares for his family, tried to push for the best in others, and provided much fun when I was growing up. My dad is "gung ho," sometimes to embarassment for a cynic like me. But you can't take away that he pulled a Rambo on a canoeing trip to which Kyle can attest (you can tell the tale).
He also called my sister when she was in early high school at a large 4 story victorian house where she had her first big baby sitting job and asked, "Have you checked the children?" My sister immediately hung up, grabbed the children, and called the POlice from the neighbors. My mom overheard the phone call from the other room and repeatedly screamed,
WHAT DID YOU JUST DO?!...WHAT DID YOU DO!" We had to cancel the movie plans and ride to the neighborhood to straighten the situation out with the cops. I cannot remember if my sister was ever asked to babysit there again, or if she even wanted to. Leaving aside the psychological damage done to my sister, it is pretty funny to think about now.
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